The Beginning (1)

Welcome to my blog. This is post one. Lets get started, shall we?
I want to clear up a few things before I tell my story.
1. You do not have to dress a certain way to be a theistic satanist, or a satanist of any kind. The way you dress does not effect your religious beliefs. Lets make this clear. Some person dressed in all black and chains and tattoos could be a catholic for all you know, and then the blonde wearing a white dress could worship Satan. Be yourself, do not fit a click. Dress how you want to. I personally love dressing in all black. Ruffles, lace, bows, inverted crosses and combat boots. That's the style I like. Yours may be different, or the same. We are all different.
2. Theistic Satanism is the traditional worship of Satan. We believe Satan exists, that he is a Lord just like God is. We believe that there is God, and Satan. God in the Heavens, and Satan in Hell. Satan is our Lord. We believe he is a figure. How you picture him is up to your mind. He comes in many forms. Many Theistic Satanists believe in all the lore (including myself) angels, demons, demonic spirits. We believe in the supernatural and demonic creatures that coincide with Satan. There is a hell, and a heaven. But we wont know what they look like until they get there. Yes, we acknowledge God and Jesus exist, but we despise them for they are hypocrites. We worship the devil, Satan, Lucifer and all his demons. Theistic Satanists believe in this magic, whereas some Satanists just believe in Satan as a figure of freedom, and don't worship him as a Lord.
3. My Theistic beliefs may be different than another theistic satanists. So therefore, be open minded to mine, because mine may be different from yours.
4. This blog is going to talk about the life style of Theistic Satanism, ways of worship. It is also going to discuss my lifestyle, health, fitness, dieting, and gothic fashion. The way I do things. This is my life, I am sharing it with you all. Here we go.




Long ago in Italy, long before our times, my family (the family name of my mother will be kept confidential) my descendants lived in a small village east of what is now Rome. The village is still there today where my family members live.  The tale goes that a family member was a "satanist" who worshiped the devil. It was possible she was possessed at some point in her life. That is all we know. I believe that when I was born, Satan breathed his air onto me. It was preordained that I would be one of his children. My household was a Roman Catholic home. My mother isn't one of those crazy Catholics, but she does believe deeply in the lore as well. I was always uncomfortable growing up around holy objects, or whenever my mother prayed. She sent me to Catholic school every Sunday and Monday nights until I was 14. (im 19 now). I always felt sick going here, I always had a deep hatred for Jesus and God. I never knew why. It continued like this for years. I remember one time I went to get a book from the closet in the basement, and I was walking up the stairs, and I had such pains I collapsed. Your all probably thinking "oh you just had cramps blah blah" but no. Things like this continued for years. Only in this holy area. Then the biggest moment happened, which I discussed in my youtube video. One day I refused to pray. I hated praying, I always refused all those years. I felt filthy whenever I did. So one day I refused to say the hail mary. So, the priests took me into a seperate classroom because I was being disruptive. They begged me to say the hail mary, and as I finally gave in (I was 12 years old) I actually threw up for no reason.  At 14 years old I convinced my mom to take me out of   the Catholic school. She agreed and I never went into a Catholic enviorment again. Around 15 years old is when the real shit began to go down.
Over the course of a few months, I had recurring dreams. They were so vivid, so real. Were they real? I dont know. The first dream was me, naked in a field of tall dead grass. The sky was moving quickly with white clouds, the sky was dark purple, an eerie color. The wind blew slightly making me chill. Across from me stood what appeared to be Satan, how I always and forever will in-vision him in my mind. I believe this is the first time he physically showed himself to me. There he stood, a tall thick figure. His hair a long tangled mess. White Ivory horns twisted from his head upward. He had long pointed ears. His eyes were the scariest thing ive seen. They were big and red, with slit pupils. Then his jaw was narrow and defined. And his teeth... they were huge fangs that looked more like a tigers, but bigger. His nose was narrow and defined,  his cheeks sunken slightly. His skin was pale white, almost like an ashy gray. He also had large claws on his hands and feet. He scared me the first time I saw him there, standing naked across the field. He was very far away from me in the first dream. Somehow he was attractive to me, but I didnt know what this all meant yet. I was 14. I didnt tell anyone about this dream. All the dream was, was us both standing a far distance away in the eerie field, naked and standing there looking at one another.
I didnt have another dream again until a few weeks later. It was the same scenario as depicted above, but he  was now closer to me in the field, about halfway across.
Then, two months later, I had the final dream. It was the same set up and scenario, but this time he reached me. Then, he brutally raped me. After I pondered these dreams for about a year, I realized I was placed upon this Earth to serve Satan. And on that day fourth, when I was about 15 I decided I was destined to be a Satanist. Ever since then, I have dreams once in a while about Satan (not always sexual either) and he has always been in the same form. Sometimes its in the same field, too. Isnt it strange?
Anyway, that is how I became a theistic satanist. I have given myself to Satan, and I serve him.
How do you serve him, you ask? There are many ways. Ignorant people always say, "why dont you just go murder a bunch of people?"
No, you ignorant fuck. That is not the way. There a a few different ways I like to worship him and give thanks. Now, this blog is for mature people. This entire blog is to be taken seriously. If you act like a child, get the FUCK out. I do have quite an attitude, so please dont waste my time. This blog is for believers and people who want to know more.
Ways to worship and give thanks:
1. Fasting.
-Doing a certain number of days of fasting is a spiritual way to connect with Lucifer. This is not starvation. It is a serious practice that has been practiced over the years in different cultures for spiritual reasons. Make sure you fast a number of days that you can manage, start your way up, 5, 10, 15, 20.. and so on. Make sure you pick a period of time to fast when you don't have to do anything important, no responsibilities. Like a vacation or a school break. You will be tired and weak. Stay in bed. To fast, slowly ween yourself off of food with water for a period of days, soon you will only drink water. Stay in bed as much as possible, for you will become extremely tired. The water is so you don't get dehydrated from lack of food. The point of a fast is for you to connect on an emotional and spiritual level with Satan. Tribes of people all over the world have practiced and still practiced fasting to connect with their Gods. It is completely safe and okay to fast. Only fast if you think you can handle it. Start of slow, pick a certain number of days to fast, and slowly you will build yourself up to longer days. Be safe and good luck.
2. Sex
-Ah, my favorite. Sex is a good way to worship Satan. Satan is a brutal figure, so have brutal sex to give him thanks. This may sound crazy to some, but if you love sex go or it. You dont have to have brutal sex, have sex you are comfortable with. Before you get started with your partner (make sure its someone close you trust, your boyfriend or girlfriend, lover) make a prayer to Satan in any way you want. Light some candles, be safe, and go. To me, Satan and sex go together. If you think about it, God is all about Chastity and what not, so if you worship Satan, get dirty. He loves to see society dirtied. So fuck away, and make God ashamed.
3. Meditation and prayer.
-This doesn't really need to be explained, does it? Light some candled or incense and get spiritual for a few hours. Concentration is the key.


there are other forms of worship out there, these are just some I practice and enjoy. Also remember, you dont have to worship physically to devote yourself to the lord. all he needs is your word, and you are his.
Please share your stories of your Satanic journey bellow, and share how you worship.
Thanks for reading post one.
-Sophie